fucking car

thru my own stupidity, i managed to kill my rear brakes a little while ago. i've had problems with them ever since i owned a car, and had to get them fixed several times when i had the jeep, and once already with the explorer. so i got in the habit of leaving them off. and i was even in the habit for a while of checking the e-brake pedal before i started to roll in the off chance i actually used them.

well, that habit fell by the wayside and the one time i use them, i completely forgot. e-brakes only work on the rear wheels, and having an SUV w/rear wheel drive and a big motor, and driving up an incline, it didn't occur to me that i had the e-brakes on until i killed them.

so i took today off with the intention of getting them fixed and having them look at a few other things. i just got the estimate for the entire job.

$3300

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck....

turns out there were MORE problems with my rear brakes in addition to my doings that have to be fixed as well. the good news (such that there is) is that those repairs are due to age (109k miles) rather than my fucking them up. that isn't to say that my fucking them up didn't help the process along, but i take minor relief in that.

not really, but i'll pretend i do. it will make me feel better.

the other major fix (again age related, and shitty road related) is on my front suspension, and a good portion of that needs to be fixed. it wasn't 100% critical to get it done today, but would need to be done sooner or later, and i know for fact would fail my car inspection. (i've had it 5 years, and it failed twice, once due to the ball joints)

things i'm not getting fixed: the 4x4 control motor, the rear wiper and the exhaust.

the 4x4 control motor is what handles the shifting of 2wd into 4wd. again, age related, not critical as i don't go off-roading in this, and i only really use the 4x4 in the winter. i'll fix that this fall.

rear wiper - i've lived w/o it for 3 1/2+ years. figured it would be an easy fix. costs too much in light of the brake situation.

exhaust - i'll take it to midas and get a better deal there. i won't sit on it too long, but i'm willing to bet it would cost 1/2 as much there.

shit fuck shit fuck shit fuck shit fuck....

looking at $2200 in repairs. so much for all that money i supposedly was saving by not having car payments....that pretty much covers EVERYTHING i had managed to save from that...

M decreed the other day that we needed (more I needed than she needed) to cut back on the frufru drinks i'm so fond of. i was thinking once in a while i might indulge. that is WAAAAAAY out the window and i'm glad i've started brewing my own coffee for ice coffees. there's a little more saved...that 5.84 i spent on the jumbo tub (w/flavor seal) of folgers made ice coffee a lot more affordable.

fuck fuck fuck...

and to think, i was figuring i'd just hold on to this thing until it ran into the ground. fucking thing did that and didn't bother to tell me.